I heard the bells of St. Peters Basilica, and something inside me, something welled up, and spilt the banks of my eyes. Walking down the sidewalk, tears streaming down my face and I have not one single clue why. Oh, sure, lovely thing the chiming of church bells, and weddings are happy occasions (as that’s why they were chiming). Minute by minute, the first … Continue reading Damn October
“My dear, Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your remains. For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover. ~ Falsely yours” ― … Continue reading The First Letter To A Dead Lover
So Mom, in homage to you, I was up Halloween night till 3am kvetching and such at an old friends. In our midnight ramblings she reminded me of how messed up I was after I separated, and left our little block at the Coves. Totally lost touch with them you know Mom, and I’m ashamed of that, cause she is a true friend. I just turned … Continue reading On Friends, And Things Forgotten
Hey Mom…I need to talk. So, I guess you could say it’s the ides of October, and so much going on I hardly even know where to begin. God, it’s hard to believe sometimes, but it will be 13 years this year. Thirteen years since that Halloween night you left us. And it astounds me how much has happened since the veil thinned and you past from us. I’ve moved home three … Continue reading October And Me
I was outside at work partaking in a cylinder of sin the other day, chatting with a co-worker, and I mentioned how I’d given this woman I saw at the bus-stop that day a bus ticket. I explained how she was on her way downtown to speak to her caseworker, and to see if she could get $10. She quickly mentioned how she was hoping the … Continue reading How I Was Humbled By Joy
I’ve been weighing lately the merits to glossing over my life with Tim and creating out of the ashes a new version of the truth. There is no easy way to remember my time with him. I remember distinctly the day I decided I was coming along for this crazy ride. I know, and as strange as it may sound, I am not misremembering that … Continue reading How Do You Mourn The Dead?
by PaulaB 