I can't describe the feeling, because it is so new. It has manifested out of the selfish acts of men, and silly notions. I am not fit for consumption, by men. They may fawn and fiddle and display their desire, I see through that gauzy veneer. I WILL NOT...I say... loud enough so only I can hear. I struggle with the words, the feelings, the fears. I WILL NOT...I say... loud and crisp full of a certainty I do not feel, yet. I look at my feet and wear my hair up. I still my rhythm; the vibe goes on, without me. I practice humility; I watch. I listen. Friends don't leave not like lovers do. Like a mantra those words resonate.