Turning from the obsessions that lead one astray, tempted by the dark nature within us all, desires that have the power, sometimes, to even stain our heart, our spirit, our soul. Can we become selfless? Buddhism would say so, but the path in our modern hi-strung world is a difficult one. Now, binging on a series called Once Upon A Time, these fabled heroes of … Continue reading Mercy For The Devil
Progressing through these posts, one by one, with a little trepidation, and reading each only maybe twice through, first to read and then again to fix the most garish mistakes and not touch them again, after adding my two cents, or a dollar’s worth. Of these days of early spring I do recall but hazily, as consumed was my mind on that leaving of a … Continue reading The 21st: Before The Dawn Of Simplicity
I’d forgotten, actually, that he used to show up at my door late at night, drunk. This feels like such a long ago and far away place, but it is only just under a year and a half old, and maybe I was too ashamed I guess to post it, as by this point it was supposed to be all done and dusted. Almost, but … Continue reading The 38th Mistake: Doing What You’re Not Suppose To
One theme, one prevailing right from the beginning, the first theme, the theme that started it all – death. A recurring theme. Like the dying and those about to die, those who have loved ones who are dying, all seem drawn to me, over and over. Long and in-depth encounters, or brief liaisons with strangers beside one another at a bar shooting the breeze. I … Continue reading The 44th Draft: how to love a dying man
This purging of the posts is rather cathartic, seeing the number drop away, this one, that one, gawd no that’s not staying, all into the trash. Originally dated October 11th, 2014, I had lived here just over a year, and it was days away from the 2nd anniversary of Tim’s death on the 18th, that month of loss and many griefs were upon me. As … Continue reading 75th Draft Dredged From The Bowels Of My Blog: It’s Not Just The Colour Of The Leaves
Back when I was 19 I thought that when I fell in love that, of course, it would be forever. Prince Charming would waltz in at some pre-ordained moment, magic would spark and the very air would tingle, and, and, yeah, what a naive putz I was. So far has not worked out that way. Not by a long shot. Love, actually, has been as … Continue reading Never Fall In Love With A Mean Drunk Artist With A Broken Heart
i love the broken ones. i always have. the lonely the tired the shattered and battered. and when he asked me what do you want? i see, now, he meant of me, with the likes of HIM. as that confident mask slipped, as he entered MY world and said: this is wonderland and i want to stay forever. i let him see me. the real, … Continue reading i liked him, i loved him
i was not a pretty in pink princess yet, a brush with chance restored faith in my creativity as with all we may not escape. pulled from the chaos of that mind i ask which face? which breath shall i let you take from me? stoic destiny sealed our fate with tiny threads and lies we told ourselves. like those rough sketches you pinned to … Continue reading a fateful reunion
on some level perhaps we all know it cell by cell our bodies decay breakdown slowdown bit by bit all of us some halted in their tracks but we’re all dying as the outer layer sheds skin day by day yet, in those waves of oxygen we share we love again posted for Outer Layers | The Discover Challenge Continue reading so we are all dying
When I first met Tim his life was about drugs, music, late nights and alcohol – and it was that life that ultimately killed him. I’d always been attracted to the music scene, and still love the energy of live music. Thus it was that I became entangled in the life he led. Yet, in time I realized that Tim’s life was not out front, but rather out … Continue reading Confessions Of A Caregiver
I’d come home from high school, and I’d often walk in to Motown blaring in the basement, and there she’d be, dancing away. Often doing the Mash Potatoe, or some other complicated thing I could never really master. My gawd, could that woman kick it. Tomorrow is the anniversary of her death. All Hallows Eve, when the veil thins, is a time of year that … Continue reading My Momma Liked To Dance
It was 3AM when I got the call. It had been an odd day. Out of the blue, or so, it seemed at the time, this volunteer lady with VON just somehow called me, and she drove me back that day to the cottage from the hospital. As she was driving me, she goes “now I have insomnia, so don’t you hesitate to call me, … Continue reading Hazey Dayz and Angelz
Haunted, beautiful, sad and the subject is hard not for me to connect with, I could create a soundtrack for this weekend, but quite frankly at the present I couldn’t name one artist I retained, other than Lana Del Rey. Lana Del Rey’s Summertime Sadness was the theme song of this weekend. My Lil’Sis discovered it on Friday night. The girls had friends over…so it … Continue reading Merry Maudlin Monday w/Lana Del Rey
by PaulaB 